Happy Times

A few days ago we received wonderful pictures of Isabella's birth father. We, along with my parents, had sent her birth family money for Tet, a beautiful picture book of Isabella's 1st year with us, and a letter telling them what she has been doing-her likes and dislikes, what she does during the day, etc. Our agency, World Child, has a foundation through which we communicate once a year with Bella's birth family. The pictures actually made me cry-it was like we were seeing a part of our family after a very long time. Looking back, I never imagined feeling this way about our baby's birth family. The reason we chose international adoption was so we didn't have to deal with a birth family. Then we were presented with a choice....an abandoned baby girl born June 26th or a relinquished (meaning her parent/s willingly put her up for adoption) baby girl born June 27th. We chose the baby with the birth family. We thought all the memories we would have of meeting them and knowing something about them would help Isabella deal with any emotions she might have being an adoptee as she gets older. Then came the news that she not only had both parents but 5 brothers and sisters too!! We imagined a single mom around the age of 18 with no other children. Bella's parents were 42 and 50 and she had siblings ranging in age from 6 to 21. Honestly, this completely through me for a loop. I immediately felt competitive, worried, and scared. What if she wanted to meet them later in life? What if she wanted to go back and live there? What if she loved them more than she loved us? I know now that those thoughts were ridiculous mainly because I don't care if she wants to go and see them and I don't care if she grows to love them. She should!! They gave her life twice-once when she was born and once when they handed her over to us. We will be eternally grateful for their gift and will do our very best to convey those feelings to her as she mature.